I got into a Facebook fight today, and I’m only mildly ashamed.
With whom? Another blogger. She posted something about how the Ban Bossy campaign was ridiculous.
If you haven’t heard of Ban Bossy, it’s a campaign by Sheryl Sandberg’s Lean In organization and the Girl Scouts. The whole idea is to stop using the word ‘Bossy’ to describe an assertive girl. An assertive little boy is a ‘leader,’ but an assertive little girl is ‘bossy,’ and this affects the way girls develop in leadership roles. The campaign really aims at developing leadership among girls and young women.
I don’t think this campaign is ridiculous. I actually think it’s a great idea.
That said, sure, the choice of marketing for this campaign is a bit silly (I love Beyonce, but she sort of sucks in the video). The word bossy is just dumb, but I recognize its power. Because of that, I was bothered by this bloggers comment and the subsequent comments to her post. Mostly, they were people saying that being called bossy is a good thing, or examples of when their little boys are bossier than their daughters and how the word doesn’t mean anything. Sure, I get all that. To an adult, being called bossy is fine, but when you’re little things are different. By the time we’re grown ass women, we know we’re more awesome than what some jerk says. But let’s not forget that words have power.
So, Facebook “fight” ensued. I argued that words are important and empowering girls is essential. She argued that the campaigns message was clouded by bad marketing.
The feminist in me took over (p.s. I hate that to so many the word feminist is negative). But then I just let it go, because if there’s one thing I hate more than people putting down people’s efforts to empower women, it’s women hating on other women. Can we get a little female solidarity?
Overall, I get it. Criticizing is easier than making a positive change, and as I emphasized in my comments: everyone is entitled to their own opinion. If you hate the Ban Bossy campaign, that’s fine. But can you give me another way that we can start empowering girls to be leaders?
Regardless of how you feel about the Ban Bossy campaign, I genuinely hope we can all agree that empowering girls to be leaders is a cause worth talking about. If only our Facebook interactions could be dialogues instead of arguments, we’d all be a tiny bit better off.
But in the meantime, before society progresses to that point, when someone tells you what you support is ridiculous, it’s my belief that you should kill them with kindness… the marshmallowy kind. So ladies keep your bossy pants on and make yourself some fancy pants rice crispy squares.
Fancy Pants Rice Crispy Squares
1/4 cup butter
4 cups mini marshmallows
3 cups puffed rice cereal
2 cups puffed millet
2 cups puffed quinoa
3/4 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
1/2 cup dark chocolate chips
1-2 tsp canola oil
Grease a 9×13 baking dish and set aside. In a large pot, met together butter and mini marshmallows. Stir until well combined. Add rice cereal, millet, quinoa and coconut. Stir to combine. Press mixture into 9×13 dish and allow to cool for an hour or two (you can put it in the fridge to speed up the process). Once cooled, cut into squares using a large chef knife.
Place chocolate chips in a bowl. Microwave for 30 seconds. Stir and microwave another 30 seconds. Repeat until chocolate is melted. Stir in 1-2 tsp of oil or enough for the chocolate to be runny. Drizzle chocolate over squares and allow to harden. Once chocolate is firm, serve and enjoy!
Why are they fancy pants? Millet is fancy. Quinoa is like the black diamond of grains. Coconut makes everything a little more exotic. Also because I said so.
What are your thoughts on #BanBossy? Feel free to give your actual opinion (even if you disagree with me, that’s cool!).
You already know my thoughts on this and I wholeheartedly agree that we need to build women up and empower them, and not tear them down. And if young girls can feel empowered enough to become leaders like Sandberg, then I’m all for it.
That being said, these fancy rice crispy squares look fab. Perhaps I need to try them with homemade marshmallows?
Ah my first attempt at homemade marshmallows was not good. I’ll keep trying though! Corn syrup-free just for you!!
These squares look amazing. I try never to get into debates on the internet at all any more. They never end, even if you make a million good, irrefutable points… It’s a minefield.
Yeah, agreed. It’s futile, but at least I got my point across? Ah Facebook! (p.s. your blood orange cake looks awesome!!)
I guess I don’t understand how anyone would be against a campaign like this…we’ve got to start somewhere! Lots of things are poorly marketed (vegetables for example) but it isn’t a reason to not believe in the cause!
And these sound awesome.
Ha! You’re right! Vegetables are definitely poorly marketed.
Your comment about poorly marketed vegetables makes me think of this:
http://www.ifc.com/portlandia/videos/portlandia-the-celery-incident
Dude….that was not a fight. I think people can disagree on an issue without getting into a fight. I still stand by my opinion.
Agreed. We disagree. Not a big deal. Calling it a fight was more for dramatic effect (that’s why it’s in quotation marks the second time around). You’re free to believe whatever you like, and so will I. I think the general point of this campaign ISN’T actually to ban the word “Bossy,” it’s about empowering girls and women and starting a conversation around gender roles. So call it what you like: conversation, fight, discussion, disagreement. Either way, it got people talking about the issue, thinking about gender roles and how we can improve the future for women.
I love the idea of banning bossy. I love your stance on it. And (almost more importantly) I love these rice crispy treats! Yum!!